Wednesday, September 22, 2010

What Kind of Mood Are You In?

Mood: "A particular state of mind or feeling; humor, or temper"

"I'm in a bad mood so it's probably best not to talk to me." or "Man, I'm in a great mood, let's go have some fun!"

How many times is your life and your marriage affected by your mood?

Some of us are more expressive than others but we are all affected by things around us and within us. Unmet expectations or unexpected interruptions can wreak havoc on our mood. Our mood can be pretty clear when we walk through the door or when we sit down at the dinner table.

Too often I fear we build our marriages on the moods we are in rather than the unchanging foundation of the gospel. A good mood doesn't guarantee a good marriage. Nor does a bad mood equal a bad relationship. These actually can be teaching moments where a husband or wife can share issues that have personally effected them and bear them together.

I've seen many spouses, (especially wives) "walking on eggshells" waiting to find out the mood of their husband or wife for fear of making things worse. The way we handle it can actually isolate us more than unite us. We are almost saying, "It's my mood therefore it's my problem."

That might work in other spheres of life but not in a Christian marriage.

We need each other to process the things that effect us, good and bad. A Christian marriage is a partnership, "in joy and in sorrow" where we don't deal with life alone. It's to be a picture of the work of Christ to his people. The finished work of Jesus is the only foundation that will NEVER be effect by mood or circumstances.

"What can separate us from the love of Christ?" Jesus did not let his mood determine his faith but instead held fast to the promises of his Father. Paul's call to us in Romans is not to find hope in our mood but in the work of the risen King.

Think about that more than 30 seconds and it will REALLY put you in a good mood!

Wednesday, September 8, 2010


Within a 48 hour time span I conducted a wedding and a funeral.

A young couple starting out with excitement and anticipation and a young life that was snuffed out in an instant.

Everybody has a perspective. It's how we process life and the things we deal with each day. The small things as well as the life changing issues. How many times have you heard it said, "You never know what each day will bring."

If you are like me we tend to take things for granted. Like another day of life. I don't want to sound morbid or promote an unhealthy anxiety about life but I fear we don't have a healthy enough fear of God. Each day really is a gift from him and we should have a perspective that effects how we live each day.

How does or should that effect my marriage? Am I taking for granted another day of life with my spouse and even taking for granted their faithfulness to me? You don't have to wait till you are at death's door to appreciate your partner.

It's all in your perspective.

How is this for perspective? "Seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness..." Jesus was saying there is no more important perspective than God's kingdom. When I look at everything through his eyes it should put everything in perspective. My life, my wife, my job, my children...all are from him and for him. How I think about and respond to these things and these people is a direct reflection on what controls my heart.

A biblical perspective is one that prepares for each day. We don't primarily wait for life to happen and then respond. This short life we have here on earth is really preparation for the eternal life we will have with Christ and his people. How is my preparation each day for my marriage a reflection of my preparation for that eternal marriage?

It's all in your perspective.