Tuesday, February 9, 2010


There's all kinds of pains with all kinds of effects.

I love the sign in the Doctor's office that asks you to assign a level to the pain. They even have facial expressions to help you pick and choose!

Pain hurts whether it's physical or emotional. Pain can't be denied or ignored. It's always present. It's a reminder that something is wrong. Something is in need of repair or relief. A gnawing, haunting presence telling me that all is not well.

Not all pain is due to volitional sin. We live in a broken world. Disappointment and pain are lurking everywhere. We can't avoid it nor can we deny it. Things just happen that are beyond our control that bring hurt to our body or soul. These are all reminders that something is critically wrong with this world. It also points us to a hope for a world where there is no pain or sorrow.

There is pain in marriage.

It hurts to feel misunderstood or unappreciated. It's a pain to admit I was wrong. There is soreness in the soul when anger or bitterness takes hold. Some pains are deeper or longer lasting. Others just seem to hang on. Then there are those things outside our situation that bring discomfort, like the loss of a job, a sudden illness, a rebellious child. The pain just doesn't seem to go away. There is no quick fix or medicine to take. We have to live with it and through it.

There is no such thing as a painless marriage.

Yet for Christians who are married there is no such thing as a hopeless marriage. We share a common bond as believers to a Savior who left a painless world and took on our pain and punishment. More than that He took on the final enemy of pain and death. Therefore, as those who have trusted the finished work of Christ there is no pain too deep or unbearable that Jesus has not conquered. No effect of sin can separate us from his love.

What does that have to do with our marriages? We have to remind each other daily of the fact that our identify is not in our pains but in the presence of Jesus. We can't let our pains get in the way of Jesus but to bring Him into our pains.

Go read Romans 8.

"And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good...." (8:28) or "If God is for us, who can be against us?...nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord." (8:31,39)

May God make you partners in this life who, because of Jesus, can rise above your pain and not run from it. May He bring you relief that brings eternal joy that actually makes you stronger in faith and life.


bwsmith said...

Thanks Jerry!

Janiece Day said...

This was great. No, more than great.

Mat said...

I love how you are not denying the pain of suffering, but you are giving me the perspective I need.