The why question can be that childhood innocence of wanting to understand. "Daddy, why do stars shine at night?" And not being satisfied with the first answer they follow up with the why question after every response we give until we feel like we have run out of answers!
It can also be a personal and probing question as to our motives and actions. "Why did you just say that?" or "Why did you just do that?" If you are like me I can handle the first round of why questions pretty well, it's the follow up "whys" that can unnerve me. When I am forced to look more closely at my actions and motives I seem to feel more threatened and get defensive.
Who has the right to question my motives and actions? In a marriage that is endeavoring to center on the glory of Christ it should naturally be the right of our husband or wife to ask the why questions. Yet too often we get annoyed and even caustic in our responses. The "nagging wife" or the "controlling husband" becomes a label we put on our spouses to make them stop the questioning. That partner in life is also your brother or sister in Christ and therefore a necessary instrument in your own personal sanctification.
This questioning on a human level should be a picture of what should be taking place on a spiritual level with the Lord himself. Who has the right to ask you ANY question and expect a true answer? The Lord himself who knows our hearts better than anyone. One of the many roles of the Holy Spirit is to ask us the why questions. He has the right to "get on our nerves" and to protect us from ourselves.
The Spirit's primary role in the believer's life is to make us look and act more like Jesus. Which is perhaps the greatest need in our marriages today, to see Jesus.
A true follower of Christ has that mindset of wanting God to ask the why questions, "Search me, O God, and know my heart..." Psalm 139:23.
The probing question is "Why?" Why aren't our Christian marriages more Christ-like? Why don't we believe the gospel? Why are we not more free to love and live in the power of Christ? Why don't we care enough to fight sin more personally? Why do we respond more out of guilt than of grace? Why don't we like people asking so many questions? Why? Why? Why?!!!!
I better stop here because I think I'm getting on my own nerves! It's time to go and practice what I preach!!
WHY NOT?!
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